weight, energize, and glow with over 50 recipes and complete 10 day detox plan.
This whole foods cleanse includes detailed menu plan, shopping list, and bonus
recipes to make after your cleanse. Renewal "Anytime" also includes
pre-detox plan, daily instructions, FAQ's, and post-detox next steps.
Are you ready to get your detox on? I
have so many exciting things in store for you. If you need a quick pick-me-up
after vacation or a binge weekend, Renewal “Anytime” is a perfect body
reboot. You can also use this detox if you need to look and feel
good fast for a wedding, reunion, or big event. Before you embark on your
detox journey, I want to talk about the word BALANCE. Ahhhh, balance.
You are told to strive for balance in your
life. In my opinion, that’s pretty difficult to accomplish. As humans, we
have so many outside sources that can get us out of whack with life. New
job, moving, marriage, trips, environmental toxins… Since you can’t control
every single thing in your life, you can, however, control what you put into
our body and how you deal with stress.
That’s why I developed Renewal “Anytime” 10
Day Detox. Think of this plan as a clean living jumpstart. You will
start with eating clean, whole foods. You will also incorporate exercise,
breathing, and even dry brushing and massage. So let’s call it a
re-balance. This is something you can do when you start to feel
“off”, overwhelmed or even heavy and tired. Our bodies do, however, strive for
balance to keep us in optimum health; physically, mentally,
emotionally, within seasons, nature, and even with each other.
Physically, your blood needs to be at a pH
level of 7.365. Did you ever hear of acidity and alkaline? Maybe in a
biology class way back? I don’t want to go into a science lesson, but
instead, I want to point out something extremely important; your body loves
you. Your body works hard to keep you alive. When we become acidic over time
due to consuming a lot of caffeine, sugar and processed foods, being exposed to
environmental toxins like pesticides, and most of all stress, this leads to
Inflammation leads to chronic disease.
Not good. We don’t want any of that.
So doing a gentle cleanse is a great way to re-balance by pumping the alkaline
foods such as dark leafy greens, veggies and fruits and taking some “me” time.
Managing stress is also a way to help the
body re-balance. Try yoga, meditation, or breathing. While eating lunch,
try sitting still for 5 minutes without the TV on, texting, or reading a
magazine. Your body is striving for balance so make sure to participate in
activities that are relaxing and soulful; alkaline activities.
While your body is working to keep you
healthy, make sure to get a re-balance once in awhile to help her out.
Take out this plan after your cleanse; use the recipes, tips and give your body
a reboot each season or when you need a healthy jumpstart. Remember that
having perfect balance isn’t really doable, but you can get pretty darn close
by following the steps in this plan.
I’m so excited to be on this wellness journey
with you. Have an amazing detox experience and keep in mind this is not about
perfection but about getting a chance to RE-BALANCE.
Pre- Cleansing Instructions
Here’s your action plan for a successful
1. Set a goal or intention. Before you
begin your detox, write down a few things you hope to achieve during your 10
days. You can reference your goals when your enthusiasm occasionally
2. Prepare your loved ones. Your
family, friends, even coworkers (especially those you eat meals with) should
know how important the detox is to you. Ask for their support.
3. Invite a friend to join in on the
fun. Even the most motivated person can derail without support.
Doing the detox with a partner means you can encourage each other, trade meals,
or even chat about daily progress. It’s nice to have someone to
commiserate with when you miss that chocolate!
First, start weaning with caffeine and
sugar. They are drugs I tell you! Plus your first few days of detox will
be extremely difficult if you don’t start weaning at least 2-3 days
For caffeine, limit your use. For
example, if you drink 3 Diet Cokes a day; try for 1 and replace with water or
an herbal tea. If you drink 4 cups of coffee, just drink 2, then half caf/half
For sugar, limit processed foods as much as
possible. Artificial and added sugars hide out in boxed and bagged
products. Also, try using natural sweeteners like stevia or raw honey
until your detox starts.
Next, limit any processed foods, gluten,
soy, dairy and alcohol during the pre-cleansing process. That way you can
ease into your detox without shocking your system.
5. Clean out your fridge. Get rid of
any old produce, leftovers, and any foods that don’t fit into the detox
plan. Make room for all the gorgeous veggies, fruits and greens. I
promise when you open up the door, you will see beauty!
6. Check your detox shopping list and look
in your pantry for items you already have on hand. Make sure you have
* filtered water * fresh lemons (for morning water especially) * extra virgin olive oil * raw apple cider vinegar ( I use this daily…fights any illness I swear!) * sea salt- preferably Celtic * organic pepper * an assortment of fresh herbs * spices (to jazz up any grain or veggie)
6. Get yourself a detox prezzie.
Invest in something that will make your 10 days more comfortable and fun.
I bought a pretty bowl for my salads and a gorgeous crystal-looking glass for
my juices. What about a cool travel lunch bag or cooler to tote around all your
detox goodies? Funky placemats to use for your meals? How can you feel special
during these 10 days? This is the most important step…ready?
7. Please use these 10 days to take care of
YOU. Tell your family and friends that you are taking time for yourself
so that they know to either help out with meals or give you some alone time at
night. Make sure to limit stress as much as possible. Also, your food is
so connected to your thoughts. Cherish each bite and take time to breathe and
be still. This is a time of connection: your body, mind, and
I’m so happy to be cleansing with you!
Renewal “Anytime” Detox...How It Works
Renewal “Anytime” Detox is for 10 days…10 days of discovering new things about
your body. How glorious!
Here’s how it works:
1. Read this entire book, cover to
cover, before you head to the grocery store.
2. Check your pantry. Do you have leftover
quinoa or a spices that can be used for the cleanse? Don’t go and buy extra
items. Stick to the list, especially if you have a budget. You might
have some of the ingredients hanging out in your cupboard or fridge.
*Most items can be found at a natural food
store. Just ask anyone in the produce section or bulk section for items you are
looking for. Don’t take a lot of time searching for items. Ask for help.
*I like to buy my grains like quinoa in the
bulk section of the grocery store; saves me a little cash plus I can get the
right amount I need for a recipe.
3. Make sure to follow the Daily Practices
such as breathing and dry brushing so you have an overall holistic experience
with your detox.
4. Journal during your cleanse to jot down
feelings, observations, etc… This is a nice way to get to know your body better
and make that body-mind connection even stronger.
5. Use the “Return to Life” section of this
book to ease back after detox. Make sure to focus on what foods you don’t need
or just want to introduce slowly.
This packet can guide you towards a plan
afterwards. As you know, each person is uniquely different, so customize
your next steps per your body, schedule, and lifestyle.
6.Use the BONUS recipes after your detox to
keep the glow going. These recipes will also help you ease back into
“regular life” without shocking your system.
Questions about detox…
Detox can be an amazing experience, but
knowing the ins and outs of the process is so beneficial to a successful
These questions have been compiled during my
work with thousands of clients. You might be asking yourself some of these
questions as you embark on this clean living adventure.
Make sure to refer to
this section before you start your detox - and during - if concerns come up.
A BRAND NEW ADDRESS (INTERVENUS Book 1) by Kathleen Rowland
File Size: 1280 KB Print Length: 170 pages Publisher: Kathleen Rowland (May 13, 2014) Sold by: Amazon Digital Services, Inc. Amazon Link About the book: THE DARKEST SINS Octogenarian CEO Gwendolyn Mantis of Botany General didn’t create the ice age cold but keeps dwindling resources out of reach for the poor. Two hundred years before, a meteor bombardment threw Earth into a second Ice Age. Mars and Venus are habitable, but her company, BotGen, started a nuclear war on Mars nuclear war. Venus is the next big hope. Cunning and meticulous, Ms. Mantis is always in control. Her right hand man, Vito Savage, knows mercy will not an option when he announces the space race to Venus.
WILL ALWAYS Dedicated to her work as a subsistence gardener, teenager Yardley Van Dyke promised her dying mother she’d care for the family by growing food, but family dynamics have changed. Her father’s fiance wants to sell the greenhouse in order to move into the swanky Bioshere. After winning a prize for her intergalactic garden, Yardley learns of the installment on her prototype in all the shuttles. She yearns for recognition. Tough, outspoken protector Marchand LaFont sails his ice boat across the frozen tundra to deliver fuel and food to the needy. Robin-hooding puts him on BotGen’s watch list. Groomed for the space race, Marchand calls the shots when he plans enters the space race and invites his best friend, Skeeter, Yardley’s twin brother,to join him as his crew. COME TO LIGHT When Skeeter decides not to go, Yardley, goes up against her father to go in his place. Hoping to start a garden on Venus, she signs on as Marchand’s crew. In spite of his brazen exterior, she falls for him. He cares for her too, but can’t let his emotions get in the way of his mission. He must keep evil Vito Savage from annihilating those who gets in his way while staying alive. Will Venus be their new address where they can fulfil their dreams?
From the living room Dad’s voice charged its way to the front porch swing. He and his fiancé were at it again. Just terrific. Hunkered under a fur-lined quilt, Yardley Van Dyke’s head pounded, worsened by the frigid air. As if trapped in a vise, pain squeezed hard from both temples. On the swing she faced forward with her back against the house. Against them. Between them. With their fight on its fourth day, they battled over her late mother’s greenhouse. Yardley tended it all day, every day. His fiancé, Pinky Hazelton, wanted to sell it and move into the Biosphere with its profits. Powerless with her at the top of the pecking order, her mouth strained. Around Pinky, she forced it into a straight line. Why did Dad ignore her promise to her dying mother? For three years, she’d grown food for the family. Mom’s hodge-podgy structure protected plants against the freeze of Earth’s second ice age. Yardley met the challenge of gardening in the frigid hinterlands, but without a surplus to sell, she had the low pro of a subsistence gardener. She reined in ideas to maximize sunlight although her latest effort worked. Discarded Mylar balloons reflected light. With fifty mounted, she pinched fewer dead leaves. Under the quilt she balanced a basket of peas on her lap, proof of success from her dirt-candy world. Yardley took a pod, tore down the string, and dumped peas into the basket. Inside the cabin Pinky screamed, “Time is running out.” Timeliness, a variation of her hammering technique, arose with every current event. “I’ll think on it.” Dad’s voice razzed like a trombone. “Better be quick.” As Pinky squawked about the essence of time, the trombone cranked louder and louder. Their bombardment sent Yardley a wakeup call. Her hands shook, and she stopped shelling for one reason. She predicted their routine. Dad blew a gasket before giving in. After that, Pinky won. He yelled, “Stop needling me, Pinky.” Hearing a smash, Yardley jerked upright. A crashed dish against the wall? She had no idea what would come next. A flipping of a table? His fiancé screamed, “Yeah? Put this in your data bucket. An ice cap moves south.” She imagined Dad’s face turning beet red as he fumed just short of a gasket-blow. Rubbing one side of her head, she faced the frigid combination of family tension and the twenty-second century ice age. Their now quiet cabin in Newport Beach, California sat in an Arctic spruce forest with northern Siberian climate suffering an annual drop of five degrees.
“Cold, colder, and about to be coldest.” Pinky filled the vacuum with truth, but was timing immediate? “You know, Pinky. While I tested you out, you took over.” Dad’s off-topic roar revealed bitterness, but he’d come around to her side. “Good thing I did. Want to sit on a polar ice cap? It kills everything that’s not dead.” Sick of listening to them, Yardley’s gaze shifted to the porch steps. With the inclement weather, they’d turn slick. She’d slip and spill her peas if she stepped down them to walk the path to the greenhouse. Not quite done shelling, a syrupy voice came through the rough-hewn triple-plank wall. “I don’t want you dead, sweetheart.” Pinky’s wear-down entered its completion stage. An icy gust blew strands of hair across Yardley’s face. She groaned and let it be. If she moved her hands, she’d spill the pods. Her thoughts shot from the greenhouse issue to a parallel problem. Without the greenhouse, she’d be a non-contributing eighteen-year-old still living at home. Pulling the quilt over her head, she preferred the ice-age temperature to hanging out with them. Using a chipmunk voice on herself cheered her up. Yardley, there’s no work for you. Run along, won’t you? Inside the cabin Pinky fueled her hissy fit with a nightmare. “Oh, Robert,” she said, “I had a bad dream.” Pinky’s premonitions often came in this form. “If we stay here, we’ll die of full-body frostbite.” The chipmunk squeaked in her mind. Bit of a cold snap. “No one wants that.” Dad’s tone warmed up. Yardley’s throat tightened. She swallowed a lump of raw emotion but refused to cry or give into defeat. She listened to Dad’s steady voice as he brought up hidden expenses at the Biosphere. “Selling the greenhouse might get us in, Hon. But can we afford it long term?” Right on, Dad. Don’t give up. “Sweetheart, we need a contract.” Within the cabin, the drama queen spoke matter-of-factly. “I know people at BotGen Incorporated.” Yardley cringed, wishing she had the means to incorporate the pink-yappy hour. Since when had Pinky become a member of Botany General’s inner circle? A few minutes passed, and they stopped talking. Was smooch-kissy-face going on? Great. Somewhere inside, her twin brother wandered about. At times like this, Skeeter bugged the crap out of her. Nothing about Pinky bothered him including her obsession to watch century-old movies. A few nights ago he’d shared his crush on a girl who lived at the Biosphere. Yardley had nowhere to go. During the feature, BRING IT ON, Pinky turned into a cheerleader with rah-rahs for Sharlene Mantis. Snobnoxious Sharlene wore brand new argyle sweaters and talked about how much they cost. Ugh. Yardley pressed a palm against her stomach. The idea of fitting in with the Biosphere’s upper crust made her want to hurl. Didn’t Skeet know? Without money and status, their family was low on both counts. She didn’t share Pinky’s worship of BioGen’s tippy top, particularly Sharlene’s grandmother, Gwendolyn Mantis. After a run-in with the octogenarian CEO, her late mother had stood up for herself, a singular rarity. From far away, her dog barked, alerting her of someone’s approach. She decoded all of Honeydog’s vocalizations, and this one didn’t imply danger. Guessing a hunter and not a charging moose, she didn’t unsheathe her paring knife. Willing herself to calm down, she centered her thoughts on the prize she’d won for her gardening talent. If her mom were alive, she’d bring out the china plates and the linen tablecloth for a dinner in her honor. Her inner chipmunk started up. You rock, Yardley. Your awesome prototype will make you famous. When? She gazed at the trees, and brittle branches danced in the squall. Balancing on the swaying porch swing, she folded and refolded her certificate. She wanted to crawl into its pleats and cuddle up against words such as congratulations, bestow upon, and honor. Wiping an angry tear from her cheek, she held the precious paper against her swelling heart. The sensation made a gradual change into rigid pride. Would her BotGen certificate, proof of her accomplishment and hers to keep, lead to concrete recognition? Job independence had to come next, the only way to be these days. The check’s intended purpose of college tuition had to be bypassed. Dad needed the ten thousand for expenses. Not enough to move into the Biosphere, the greenhouse sat on Pinky’s auction block.
Exile (The Oneness Cycle Book 1) by Rachel Starr Thomson Kindle Edition File Size: 3318 KB Print Length: 241 pages Simultaneous Device Usage: Unlimited Publisher: Little Dozen Press (January 10, 2014) Amazon Kindle Link
Note: I received a review copy of this book free from the publisher, Little Dozen Press. The review posted below is based on my personal thoughts while reading the book. Ratings:★ ★ ★ My thoughts: I liked Reese's story, I always enjoy reading about angels, demons, and details of heaven and hell. It was that good during the first part of the story but as soon as The Oneness was discussed, I got lost. The Oneness keeps too many secrets, been guessing too many twists but it didn't reveal its secrets up until half of the book and it became tiring. From then on I can't keep up anymore with the story and the characters. There are others who enjoyed the book, to read them, click HERE.
About the book: When Tyler fishes the girl out of the bay, he thinks she's dead. She wishes she was. For Reese, life ended when the supernatural entity called the Oneness threw her out. For Tyler, dredging Reese out of the water means life is nothing he thought. In a world where the Oneness exists, nothing looks the same. Dead men walk. Demons prowl the air. Old friends peel back their mundane masks and prove as supernatural as angels. The Oneness changes everything. And getting Reese home, making her One again, will change Tyler--and his roommate, Chris, whose connections with the Oneness have been buried most of his life--forever. About the author:
Rachel Starr Thomson is a writer, indie publisher, and editor. She's the author of The Oneness Cycle, The Seventh World Trilogy, and many other books. Rachel dwells in southern Canada but regularly travels all over North America, writing, speaking, and singing. She's a homeschool graduate, a lover of long walks, good books, and hot tea, and a counter-cultural revolutionary who thinks we'd all be much better off if we pitched our television sets out the nearest window. You can visit Rachel's website, www.rachelstarrthomson.com, to learn more about her work, read free stuff, and sign up for her newsletter.
Warning: Contains explicit sex scenes between women and slightly hard-core autoerotica.
DESIRE. Twenty-five year old Olivia Pappas thinks she's frigid, until she’s bewitched in a Parisian café by exotic Fairuz. Though same-sex love is taboo in both their cultures and religions, unstoppable passion arises as Olivia becomes immersed in an erotic affair that rips away her insecurity, giving her the confidence to live comfortably in her own beautiful skin.
call them extraterrestrials, others call them Gods. This is their story.
Sir Henry Johnston falls into a volcanic crater, two warriors from another
world come to his rescue; they manage to keep him alive. These two warriors, a
female named Suchja and a male named Dran, are Tesgans who claim to be here
protecting planet Earth and its inhabitants, including plants and animals, on
behalf of Annur’s Empire.
Henry questions their claims but he can’t do much more. He is nearly comatose.
Suchja tells Sir Henry to consider reading or listening to the Expedition
Reports because that’s where he can find most of the answers he seeks. Thus
begins a most amazing saga: How these beings got here, how they made us, how
they transformed us, how they continue to influence us, and how they are
protecting us from enemies that wish to do us harm.
“How can you tell that I will survive this
accident and that I will continue to live inside this body?” I ask a bit
“Dran and I can
travel in time; and we can tell you that Star [Sir
Henry’s dog] will reach her destination;
she will get a rescue party to come this way and in four days time they will
arrive here by midafternoon. They will reach you before nightfall and lift you
out of the crater as the night sets in. You will come to in a hospital the
following morning,” responds Suchja with a big comforting smile and sparkling
just said that if my soul stays out of my body for an extended period of time,
I will need to be reborn into another body. Are you telling me that you believe
in reincarnation?” I inquire looking at her in total disbelief.
is the only process by which you and everyone on your planet are reborn, sir,”
replies Suchja totally sure of her answer.
“Where I come
from, most people don’t believe in reincarnation. They think it is a difficult
concept to grasp.” I inform her.
reincarnation is not difficult to understand,” Suchja says with that beautiful
smile of hers.
“Maybe not for
you, Suchja; you don’t need it anyways, but for us it is a rare concept; if
anything, it is a big mystery,” I tell her.
“Sir Henry, you
know very well what water is. Suppose for a moment that you are a drop of water
and you are about to be dried out due to the weather. You evaporate and leave
behind a few particles, which are mostly minerals. You are purified as you are
raised towards the sky where you will become part of a cloud. Sometime later,
you will return to the ground and begin your life anew as another drop of
water. This will be repeated endlessly until the end of times. Your soul is
exactly the same. Your body dies, leaving behind bones, which are mostly mineral,
and your soul goes up to heaven where you get purified and later you are reborn
into a new body, you will continue to do this until you become worthy of
entering and remaining in our world; simple as that; although the process is a
bit more complex,” says Suchja.
Series: MIRA Paperback: 384 pages Publisher: Mira Books; Library ed edition (February 4, 2011) Amazon Buy Link
Ratings: ★ ★ ★ My thoughts: Oh well, this is my first book from Ms. Higgins. I picked this up because I was intrigued by the synopsis, main character's ex-fiance is dating her younger sister. I've been friends with girls (three girlfriends) who got cheated by the best friends. One actually went all the way, married her best friend's (ex) boyfriend. And this book, not just a best friend, but sister? Cool. Anyway, the story is more like a 'family drama' which honestly didn't sink in until the last 50 pages of the book. I liked Grace's family, especially 'the sister'. I dunno, I couldn't hate her. Maybe because Grace's situation is milder than my real life experiences with the cheating bestfriends. There was no lying and cheating for me (sister), even Grace couldn't hate her baby sister. The only major problem I had with this book were the boyfriends, old and new. I hated the old for the obvious reason, and although the new boyfriend got points in my hotness meter, we just didn't click. Overall, it was just an okay book. To read positive reviews for this book, click HERE. About the book: How far would you go to get over a guy? When Grace Emerson's ex-fiancé starts dating her younger sister, extreme measures are called for. To keep everyone from obsessing about her love life, Grace announces that she's seeing someone. Someone wonderful. Someone handsome. Someone completely made up. Who is this Mr. Right? Someone…exactly unlike her renegade neighbor Callahan O'Shea. Well, someone with his looks, maybe. His hot body. His knife-sharp sense of humor. His smarts and big heart. Whoa. No. Callahan O'Shea is not her perfect man! Not with his unsavory past. So why does Mr. Wrong feel so…right? About the author:
Kristan divides her time between home in Connecticut and summers on Cape Cod. She is the mother of two lovely kids, the wife of a brave firefighter, and a devoted Ben & Jerry's fan. Previously a copywriter, Kristan began writing fiction when her children graced her life with simultaneous naps...so much more satisfying than folding laundry. She holds a BA in English, which enables her to identify dangling participles and quote many great novels. She loves to connect with readers on her website www.kristanhiggins.com and her Facebook page www.facebook.com/KristanHigginsBooks
Post Civil War. Families move west to begin rich new lives, only some never make it. There is a creature that lurks in the vast open deserts of the west. It can only survive on blood and, although it prefers to prey on the weak and young, it will slaughter anyone or anything, once provoked. It is unnatural, deceptive, and difficult to kill. Word about the existence of this elusive beast has not spread since anyone who has crossed paths with it did not live long enough to tell of their account.
Night of the Chupacabra is one man’s journey to reunite with his missing family, while the lethal creature that separated them, the mysterious and ravenous chupacabra, is never far behind. Night of the Chupacabra is not only a gruesome regale of carnage, but a unique combination of science fiction bloodshed with a more poignant tale of lost love set against a Western backdrop. Night of the Chupacabra is an unflinching look at the impossible choices made for family, while knowing the consequences will ultimately lead to a fate worse than death.
They never thought their luck would be their curse. In the months following the onslaught, the extraordinary survivors continue to know no peace, as they are haunted by signs that the relentless creature remains on their trail. However, this fight will be better matched, now that they’ve discovered an advantage that will help protect them from the monster’s bloodthirsty lust. But once faced with the decision to kill the beast, the choice will not come lightly since it is still unclear which loved one the chupacabra possesses.
Inside a small village within the Great Plains of Montana, a ritual initiated in blood will be performed. This ceremony has been executed only once before and will mark a rite of honor and justice. Commonly, the Assiniboine are a harmonious people with strong pride and passions, but turn to the spirits for vengeance when wronged. The tribe’s chief will summon the Great Spirit on behalf of his people, for no earthly man can make evil suffer like a greater evil.
Legend of the Chupacabra finds Jessie and Suzanne living peacefully in Portland, Oregon, six years after they believed to have put an end to the curse of the chupacabra. But the women come to learn of their failure and the futility of their sacrifices when a remarkable reunion brings horror back into their lives; only this time, what they face will be unlike any creature they've encountered. Legend of the Chupacabra marks the end of a trilogy but the continuation of a saga that will leave this moment of history drenched in blood.
About the author:
In addition to being an author and a Southern California native, Michael Hebler also has a career in film publicity. Michael's current focus is on a series of dark thriller novels based on the legendary 'el Chupacabra' with Book One, "Night of the Chupacabra", releasing on October 17, 2012. In June 2011, Michael published a short-story prologue to the Chupacabra Series, "Hunt for the Chupacabra", available for free download. Michael is also the author of the children's picture book classic, "The Night After Christmas", available in both ebook and print formats. Michael enjoys running a blog in his spare time, "My Little Obsessions", where he rambles about all the things he loves, which tends to be a distraction from his work. Author website:http://www.michaelhebler.com My Little Obsessions:http://michaelsobsessions.blogspot.com/
Me on the Floor, Bleeding by Jenny Jägerfeld Age Range: 12 and up Grade Level: 6 and up Paperback: 288 pages Publisher: Stockholm Text (July 15, 2014) Amazon Link
About the book: A coming of age story that centers around seventeen year Maja who, in the midst of coping with the fact that her mother has Asperger's and a complicated relationship with her father, falls in love for the first time. Written by professional psychologist, Jenny Jägerfeld, this novel is told with such bare bones honesty that one can’t help but be drawn in. Maja is both wise beyond her years and naïve in ways one wouldn’t expect. Her story begins with an accident that leaves her 'on the floor bleeding' and ends with a bittersweet revelation.
Thursday, 12 April Spurting Blood It was a quarter to one on Thursday the twelfth of April: one day before the so-called unlucky thirteenth. I had just sawn off the tip of my left thumb with an electric saw. I stared at my thumb—what was left of it, I mean—with its pale midwinter skin and the pinky-red stuff inside. The flesh. In a detached kind of way I noted that I’d sawn it off quite neatly, that the edges of the cut were straight, which was good. Wasn’t it? I searched my mind for relevant experiences but I came up blank. Empty. My knowledge of sawn-off body parts was distinctly limited. Regardless, the cut suddenly became fairly difficult to make out because a massive stream of blood spontaneously spurted right up into the air. Like a tiny geyser. The saw fell to the floor with a violent crash. Perhaps I dropped it, perhaps I threw it away from me; I don’t remember. I grabbed my thumb with my right hand and held it tight, so tight my knuckles turned white. One second passed, then another. I watched as the saw jerked across the floor, its blade wildly vibrating.
Everything in my vision swam about like bad television reception and a stream of blood forced its way between the thumb and index finger of my right hand. Then blood began pouring out between every finger and my right hand gradually turned bright red. I tried to squeeze even tighter but the blood just kept gushing through. It dropped onto the white worktop with such relentless speed you’d think someone was spraying it with red paint. Suddenly it felt as if my stomach was emptying itself of its contents, as if I was in a lift and the cable had just snapped, and instead of slowly travelling upwards I found myself freefalling down the shaft. I was forced to let go of my thumb and grab the back of the chair to keep my balance. That was the green light for the blood: now it spiralled and poured and pumped out from what had once been one of my most important digits. The starched front of my button-down men’s shirt was sprayed red. Shit. Dad’s going to be angry. This ought to be hurting, I thought objectively. Why isn’t it hurting? At that very moment a bomb detonated right in the middle of my hand. And then another. And another. The pain was red hot and hard. The pain was absolutely, inconceivably agonising. I tried to breathe but I couldn’t. My throat had closed up. The oxygen had run out. I looked around the studio in mute panic. All work had stopped. No one was at the potter’s wheel. No one was moulding plaster, bending metal, or messing about with papier-mâché. They were just staring silently in my direction, in the direction of the pool of fresh blood on the floor. At my bloodstained hands and the blood-red handprint on the back of the wooden chair. They were silent.
They had never been so silent. The only thing you could hear was the saw aggressively attacking the floor. The sound of metal teeth against stone. It was as though I was forty metres under the sea. The pressure of thousands of square metres of water made my body slow and sluggish. My vision became indistinct and cloudy and the sound of the saw was elongated and distorted. I looked at my classmates. They were gently undulating at their workbenches. Like seaweed, I thought dreamily, in the split second before I finally managed to gasp in some air and scream at the top of my lungs. It was a raw and rasping sound, as if I hadn’t opened my mouth all day. I screamed, wide-eyed, as one explosion after another went off in my thumb. I screamed like I had never, and I mean ever, screamed before and it was impossible, totally out of the question, to stop. I tried to meet Enzo’s eyes but his expression was difficult to read behind his protective goggles. The elastic around his head was so tight that it dug into his skin and pushed his chubby cheeks upwards, squashing them together underneath the scratched lenses. He broke away from the frozen crowd, moving jerkily like a robot. Without taking his eyes off me he bent down and picked up something small from the floor, something a pinky-red colour, and he stretched out his arm to give it to me. When I didn’t make any attempt to take it he placed it in the palm of my right hand. Then he sank silently to the blood-covered floor, less than a metre away from the saw. Valter ran. He ran so fast his soft curls flapped about. Normally his movements were slow and dignified. Not now. Never before had I seen him move so fast from his desk to our workbenches at the back. I didn’t hear the characteristic clicking of his heels against the stone floor and that surprised me until I realised it was my own voice, my own continuous bellowing, that prevented every other sound from reaching my ears. I looked down at my unmangled right hand and studied the object in my palm. I knew what was lying there but still I couldn’t understand it. I just couldn’t, somehow. It was too . . . absurd. Plain out disgusting, in fact. There in the palm of my hand lay a part of my body. A part of me. The tip of my thumb. It was so light, no heavier than a pea, or maybe two. I could hardly feel it. I didn’t want to look at it but it was impossible not to. The upper rounded surface of the nail was intact. A little sliver of wood shaving had fastened in the bloody, fleshy side. I glimpsed something white behind the blood and realised it was my bone. My own skeleton.
I was wrong. The edges of the cut were not straight. They were shredded, like minced meat. For a second everything went black. Unfortunately I did not faint. Not then. Instead, a violent nausea bubbled up into my throat and with the self-control of a Russian gymnast I succeeded in holding back the vomit. Abruptly the aggressive hacking of the saw stopped. Valter had wrenched the plug from the wall. And at that exact moment I stopped too, as if the saw and I had been connected to the same socket. There was silence. An echoing silence. Valter took a step towards me. He stood too close, like someone with poor social skills, and his breath hit my face in small, minty puffs. He gulped and in his grey-blue eyes I could see alarm. Maybe even panic. It was something about the speed of his irises racing from side to side in tiny, hardly perceptible movements. A few seconds passed as we stood like that, our eyes locked together. Then there was a noise, a drawn-out whimper. Simultaneously Valter and I looked down at the floor. There was Enzo. It was like someone had paused a frame in a horror movie. The saw was less than ten centimetres from his right ear. He had blood on his cheek and in his hair, and splashes of blood on his goggles. My blood. His brown eyes were staring and his mouth was gaping as if he was about to scream but had been distracted. I noticed that his fly wasn’t zipped up properly. Suddenly there was the sound of tentative footsteps and electronic tapping. I looked quickly over my shoulder and a blinding bluish-white flash went off right in my face. Click. It was Simon. Naturally it was Simon. He moved his mobile phone closer to my hand. Click. Then he pointed it at the floor and Enzo. Click. The blood, the goggles, his zipper. Everything was illuminated by that deadly flash. Click. Click. Click. Self-consciously Enzo shut his mouth. He cleared his throat. From his humiliating position on the floor he said: ‘Stick your thumb in . . . in your mouth. The tip of your thumb, I mean. That’ll make it easier to sew it back on, that’s . . . that’s what I’ve heard.’ Everything started spinning. I heard the click and his voice like an echo, but weirdly distorted: Click. Stick your thumb in . . . in your mouth. I fell backwards and my head hit something hard. Click. It was a merciful release when everything went black.